The ups and downs of ParenthoodJune 24, 2020
With everything that’s going on in the world at the moment, reflection has been on top of the list more than ever. Reflecting on my role in particular as a mother during these times. Covid-19 and the black lives matter movement has made me want to watch, listen and learn more about these current affairs.
Whether you’re a parent of a newborn, toddler, school aged child or teenager, do you ever stop to wonder, how am I doing? Am I tackling this whole parenting thing the right way? Am I doing a good job? I guess you never really know. All you can do is hope that you are bringing them up to be good, decent, kind, loving, considerate and respectful human beings.
I remember years ago a friend of mine said to me, you’re bringing up adults not kids. At the end of the day your kids will become adults and it’s what kind of adult you want them to be in the world. That’s when it dawned on me that my kids’ upbringing comes from us, their parents. So, I had to look at myself and how I am as a person. Am I good, decent, kind, loving, considerate and respectful?
At the end of the day, we are all human and no one is perfect. We all make mistakes, we all have regrets but how you learn and grow from it all is what matters. The choices we make can also really impact your life in good and bad ways.
The other day I watched an interview of actress Jada Pinkett Smith interviewing her husband, Will Smith. He talked about his role as a father and the ups and downs. One thing he said stuck with me. He described how there is something really rewarding and challenging about being a parent and delivering human beings to the world and to themselves. Our kids are not ours, they are their own people and we as parents need to let go of our own needs and desires for their lives. As parents we can provide them nourishment and support to have a beautiful and loving relationship and in turn hope that this pattern continues when their time comes to delivering their own human beings to the world.